Decisions

Decisions are a funny thing, you try to use all of your resources when making them, you weigh the pros and cons, you trust your gut/head/heart and in the end, what do you have? You have life; you have to live with the decisions you have made and well, some of the time no matter what you used to make a decision, it turned out to be wrong.

I'm writing about decisions because I am struggling with my new job, I am catching on quickly, enjoy my co-workers but I'm not challenged. I feel like I just traded one bad receptionist job for another. It may be that I haven't given it enough time, I have only been there for 6 days, but there is something in my heart telling me I'm not going to be happy there. I wanted it for the opportunity to grow. I wanted to be able to make something of myself. I wanted jump start my career. I was so excited after my first couple of days, learning the new things and how the job works. Now, 6 days in, everything feel mundane, I feel like I could do the job in my sleep. I also don't believe in the product like I did at my last job so that is hard to get used to. The negativity is building inside of me and I'm struggling.

I feel like I failed, like I shouldn't have left my last job and I made a huge mistake. In short I am panicking about the decision that I made.

I know I should give it more time; but then I think, if I know I'm unhappy should I really lead these people on? Should I go about my day to day life while looking for a new job (yet again)? Does this job deserve my loyalty? The people are so nice and I'm getting attached to them as the days go on, I feel guilty just thinking about this. This is hard for me, being so I'm unsure of my thoughts and feelings, I'm scared to make any more decisions because my last one was apparently not very well thought out. If I had thought about it longer would it have changed anything?