Paleo Lasagna

Tonight on the menu was Paleo Lasagna, it was amazing! The more I substitute vegetables for carbs the more surprised I am that I am not only a little satisfied but more satisfied than when I eat meals the tradition way. The other neat thing is that I eat less than I would when I have a bunch of carbs in the meal I am eating, and with all of the new recipes I've been trying I'm never bored.

After my lasagna I prepared a slow cooker soup that is going to cook tomorrow when I am at work. This way when I get home I can eat right away, something that is greatly appreciated on a Friday. No fuss Friday is the way to go!

This weekend my goal is to do the 450 calorie work out that I found on Pinterest, it's mostly squats, running on the spot, abs exercises, that sort of stuff. These are the exercises I tend to gravitate towards because they seem easier to me. I really want to complete this exercise and maybe do some extra cardio as well. I want to start a momentum that continues into next week and beyond. Oh my other goal of the weekend is to finish my laundry, good goals :)

One Month In

One month ago I decided I wanted to be healthier, 3 weeks ago I started treating my body the way it deserves to be treated. Feeding myself food that is beautiful, tasty and actually gives me the energy I need to get things done in my life. The first week I was a rock-star, had great recipes for every day and completed them all. Second week we had a guest and my meals went a little wonky, I ate well but felt scattered most of the week. Third week I still did my grocery shopping with my recipes but skipped a couple of days and went out to eat at restaurants instead of cooking. Overall I am super proud of myself, even though it wasn't my goal I have lost about 5 pounds. Other perks are I am experiencing a lot more energy, I'm not hungry during the day and for some reason I am warmer than I usually am. I actually have been working to complete my caloric intake at the end of the day (most of the time a glass of wine is perfect). It's amazing how full vegetables make you, I feel like someone should tell the world about them (the obviousness of healthy eating is not lost of me, and I feel a little silly that it has taken me this long to figure it out.)

What I am still struggling with is the exercise; healthy eating I am on board with, but I just can't seem to find time in my day to get my exercise in. When I say "fit in" to my day I mean I can't seem to get the motivation to get off my butt. I'm planning on obtaining some exercise equipment on boxing day hopefully so I can at least have a treadmill to step onto while I watch TV.  I know exercise is good for me, just like I knew vegetables were good for me but somehow I'm still not exercising. I will try try and try again, I will be fit, I will be strong. I'm now going to plan my weekly meals and maybe tomorrow I will do the new workout I found! Wish me luck!

Day 16

I just got back from the grocery store, stocked up on beautiful greens, lean meats, bright reds, vibrant yellows and eye catching oranges. This is the 3rd week of making my grocery list from recipes and it makes me feel amazing. I love the direction I have in the grocery store, with a list I don't even look at the other food I am so focused to get all of my ingredients and there is no room for anything else in my cart.

This weekend was so strange, I had my company Christmas party and the morning of I woke up and actually worked out! Finally I had the urge and actually did it, which may have been a bad idea in hind sight because I also went curling for the Christmas party. These 2 sets of workouts, along with my healthy breakfast and healthy lunch led to a hard core binge on Saturday night. I didn't even see it coming, I knew I was going to be my cheat night but it seemed to get out of hand so quickly and.... then I was puking. Terrible right? According to my alcohol consumption I shouldn't have gotten sick, I only had 6 drinks over 7 hours, but I think it was the mass amount of nachos I forced into my mouth at rapid fire speed when we arrived at the party, then later there were the wings, and the poutine. When I got home I laid down on my bed and that was it, all the food came out of my stomach immediately.

I learned a valuable lesson, when you are only putting good things in your body it does not appreciate being forced to eat a mass amount of garbage food (no matter how delicious). Cheat days are good but moderation is the key. Try not to eat everyone else under the table, oh and maybe eat slowly to actually taste the food you eat. Lesson Learned.

The good part about my binge is I got right back on the horse/ wagon, I felt less terrible in the morning than I thought I would so I focused on drinking water and planning my weekly meals. The recipe I tried last night was cauliflower crust pizza! It was really tasty, though I should have doubled the recipe, I will know for next time. My sister also pointed out today using flour would cut down on the stickiness of the crust because I was having issues with it sticking to the pan.

I think the best part about keeping control of my eating is having the energy to run my errands. I shoveled my walk today, and it felt good. It's like my body is finally getting that addiction to being healthy I've always heard about but thought was made up by healthy people. I am so happy with my progress, I am so proud of myself.

You are who you Choose to be

Week 1 and a half ish

This week kicked my butt! I wanted to use the other word but I'm not sure of the rules on these blog things. It's amazing how one little change to your routine can throw you for a loop, and a huge loop it was. Firstly on Saturday a friend came to stay at our place for a couple of days, eating started out great for the first 2 days but the third day I tried a new recipe that did not agree with my stomach. Along with not feeling so great in the stomach region, I joined a group of old university friends out one evening and had a pub meal (which wasn't that bad, flat-bread and caesar salad). Later in the evening I caved and had nachos which did not help the stomach situation at all. All through this week my wonderful city was having a massive snow storm that involved me having to be shoveled out of a snow bank by a neighbor and experiencing -25 C all week.

After the pub night was the day my work buys us lunch and of course everyone wanted pizza, and that day I got great news at work so that evening my husband and I went out for a celebratory dinner. Starting today I was focusing on getting some vegetables back into my system, because to me completely honest I have felt terrible this week! It's amazing how my body was immediately mad at me when I stopped putting vegetables in it, it was like withdrawal from the goodness I had been putting in my body.

Today at work I had veggies and hummus throughout the day; then greens, shrimp and asparagus for supper. I would like to have more food this evening, though I feel it may be because of the extra food I put into my body this week. I may decide to have the rest of the raw vegetables I have in the fridge but I'm not sure yet. I'm in one of  those, I want to throw my healthy eating thing out the window and eat everything I can in my line of sight moods (damn PMS).

Bottom line is I had a hard week.

Day 8

I am in LOVE with eating healthy, and also I am the QUEEN of will power this week. Will power achievements to date #1 we had 7 layer dip, chips, spinach dip and bread at work this week, I had NONE of it. Achievement #2, at a dinner party at my best friends place yesterday there were chips and hummus, I had NONE. Today I went to the grocery store while I was very hungry and instead of getting rice filled sushi (that I really wanted) I got shrimp, peppers and cauliflower. So PROUD of myself, and I am apparently okay with blowing my own horn, which in this case I think is okay.

With this wonderful week behind me I have to stay sharp, stay focused and as always try to exercise more. I am really enjoying the way my body is responding to eating healthy, really feel like the food I am eating is fueling my body.

The question is, how do I get myself to exercise? I think about it, I want to do it but somehow the end of the day comes and I haven't done it. I've been thinking about getting a treadmill/ elliptical but still haven't bought one. I can't seem to get over the block that I have, am I just lazy? Or do I just not want it enough?

These are hard questions, maybe I need to plan more, or maybe when I get used to the healthy eating I will find more time to exercise? More probably I don't want to face the difficulty I will have when I finally exercise and consequently the sore muscles that will come from that exercise. Why am I so scared of hard work?

Day 6

After my lack luster post 2 days ago and then my non existent post yesterday I bet you thought I wasn't going to post again? That I had fallen off the wagon? Nope! I dealt with busy life and still stayed on track with my goals. This morning we had an appraiser come to the house, we want to get an increase of funds from the bank to finish the renovation off correctly. So this person came to decide if we are doing the right things with our money. In preparation for the visit my hubby and I have spent all the evenings this week working on getting the house together; mostly cleaning, which is why I haven't been strictly "exercising." I have been active but not in the hardcore way I envisioned at the start of the week.

The awesome thing is I have been kicking ass at eating correctly, I cooked meals every night this week (for me this is huge!) Tonight I made Curried Shrimp with Mango Couscous, and it was spectacular! For anyone struggling with healthy eating this recipe will change your mind about being able to do it.I made a couple of changes to the recipe as I did with the other one but I hope you enjoy.

INGREDIENTS

• 1cup  whole-wheat couscous
• 1mango, peeled and diced
• 1teaspoon  finely diced jalapeno pepper
• 1tablespoon  plus 1 teaspoon freshly squeezed lime juice
• 1/4cup  chopped cilantro
• Salt
• Freshly ground black pepper
• 2tablespoons  red curry paste
• 2teaspoons  vegetable oil   (I don't think this is necessary if you have a good non stick pan)
• 1tablespoon  plus 1/2 teaspoon finely minced garlic
• 3/4pound  shrimp, cleaned and shelled, tails on
• 17 ounce container 2 percent Greek yogurt  (I used fat free sour cream)
• 1teaspoon  grated ginger    (I used powdered ginger and 4 teaspoons, but I love ginger)
• Lime wedges (optional)

**I also added broccoli to the recipe, I steamed it then mixed it into the couscous because I thought it needed more green**

DIRECTIONS

1. Cook couscous according to package directions. Combine with mango, jalapeno pepper, 1 teaspoon of the lime juice and half the cilantro. Season to taste with salt and black pepper.

2. In a large bowl, whisk together red curry paste, vegetable oil, 1 tablespoon of the garlic and remaining lime juice. Add shrimp; toss to coat.

3. Mix together yogurt, ginger and remaining cilantro and garlic in a small bowl. Season to taste with black pepper.

4. Heat a grill to medium high. Grill shrimp until just cooked through, about 2 minutes per side.

5. Arrange shrimp and couscous on a platter and serve with the yogurt sauce. Garnish with lime wedges if desired.

Now after eating veggies all week I sort of went crazy and took a lot of the couscous without realizing it, and didn't notice until I was done eating. This wasn't too big of a deal because I had a good day for calories and couscous is very nutritious; however, I just wanted to put out a word of warning, though it is a grain it packs a punch with it's calories.

That was the day I had, I'm going to get some much needed relaxation tonight and get to eat that delicious meal again for lunch tomorrow. This time I am going to measure my couscous. :)

Day 4

I made chicken for supper tonight, and I've decided I don't like chicken, it's so blah. It's just not delicious at all to me anymore. I would so much rather have an amazing piece of fish! I tried a new recipe and it had so much potential but in the end it was still chicken. I guess this means I will have to focus on fish to make my meals.

One triumph though! At work today we had "snack day" which is where the staff gets a spread of food to snack on during the day. My co-worker bought 7 layer dip, spinach dip, bread and chips and I had NONE OF IT! I was so proud of myself for being super strong.

I didn't exercise today, we have an appraiser coming to the house on Thursday so we are working hard to get the house in shape for it. I did a little cleaning earlier but not enough to burn the calories I need to lose any weight or to tone myself the way I am aiming. I did the 300 ab workout on Sunday and my leg sockets hurt so much from it. I feel like I may have strained something, or I'm just making excuses so I don't need to exercise. Who knows really? I'm going to spend the next half hour looking for some fitness motivation because I'm starting to need the push.

Oh and I said yesterday I wasn't feeling hungry and today I have hit the hunger phase, I guess this is a good thing. My mood will get better tomorrow, I can feel it.

Day 3

Today was a great day! I ate really well, did some house work for exercise and am currently 226 calories under my daily count. Hooray! I'm having small doubts about my diet because I have not been feeling hungry or deprived like I usually do when I start a new eating regime. I hope this is because I'm focusing on protein and vegetables instead of filling my stomach with empty carbs.

I made an amazing supper tonight as well, I am having such a good time cooking delicious meals. I have always enjoyed cooking but felt I never had time for it so this amount of cooking is very new for me. I'm posting the recipe below, I substituted green onion for shallots because I prefer the taste. Also I used truffle oil instead of canola oil because I was feeling fancy.
 
Teriyaki Salmon with Zucchini  
 
Ingredients:  
Low-sodium teriyaki sauce (I used a blood orange ginger teriyaki)  
2 (6-ounce) salmon fillets  
Sesame seeds  
2 small zucchini, thinly sliced  
4 scallions, chopped  
Canola oil  
 
Directions:  
 
Combine 5 tablespoons teriyaki sauce and fish in a zip-top plastic bag.  
Seal and marinate 20 minutes.  
Toast sesame seeds in a large nonstick skillet over medium heat, and set aside.  
Drain fish, discarding marinade.  
Add fish to skillet, and cook 5 minutes.  
 Turn and cook for 5 more minutes over medium-low heat.  
 Remove from skillet, and keep warm.  
Add the zucchini, scallions, and 2 teaspoons oil to skillet.  
Sauté 4 minutes, or until lightly browned.  
Stir in 2 tablespoons teriyaki sauce.  
Sprinkle with sesame seeds, and serve with salmon.

So far so good with eating and activity, I'm feeling really good physically and mentally so that is obviously helping. I can't wait to see what tomorrow brings :)

Day 2- Abs

I tried my hardest this week to eat lots of veggies, I only exercised once and then half way through the week I ended up with free tickets to a hockey game from my work. The tickets led to going for food and drinks before the game and that led to pizza for lunch on Thursday as well as dinner out again. By Friday I was feeling discouraged, this is the pattern I always follow, I eat healthy for a while then give into a craving I have. Though I think my biggest problem is exercise, I think about it all the time but the number of times I actually get off the couch and do it are a lot less than I would like. So Friday night I thought about what was really going on, why if I feel I want it so much, what is holding me back? 

This is an issue I feel a lot of people go through when they are starting to change their life, if it's eating right, exercising, spending more time on themselves, spending less money. Whatever the issue is people have a hard time doing what they want because it is breaking a habit they have done for many years. Most of the time there is a psychological block against the change they are trying to make. I have no basis for this insight, I'm just taking what I hear on the biggest loser (love that show!) and using it to make myself feel better about my limitations. 

I think I have this block because where I grew up exercise was solely for people who needed to lose weight. It wasn't about being healthy or treating your body right, if you exercised you must be fat or see yourself as fat and were trying to lose weight. (A lot of the things I think are completely ridiculous, I acknowledge this, that's why I'm trying to change the way I think). In my mind I am scared to start my fitness journey because I don't want people to think I'm fishing for complements, I don't want to tell people I have been working out and have them say, why? You don't need to lose weight. This isn't about losing weight, this is about me wanting to have a smoking hot body that is toned and strong. I want to have endurance and not be out of breath walking up stairs, and to be able to hold my own if someone needs help moving something. I want to be able to protect myself and to not feel so vulnerable. I want to take care of myself, and have being physically active as a part of my life so when I have kids they can experience being active as being normal and healthy, not something you do because you don't like the way you look.

All of this was discovered in a conversation with my husband, who always leads me to what I need to hear, even though I always do most of the talking. I'm going to do this, I'm going to be that fitness buff I want to be and in doing so I am going to ignore my past, ignore that I have never been an active person, ignore that most of my friends at home will probably laugh when I tell them. I will be healthy for myself, I will work hard, I will have cheat days and I will get that smoke-show body. The bottom line is this will take some time, but my goal is to have fitness be a regular part of my life by next summer, to exercise because I love it and to eat healthy delicious food.

I guess I started officially yesterday, I ate my allocated calorie intake (actually came under 82 calories due to exercise) and did 2 mini workouts, which is impressive considering it was Saturday night and I kept my head during the drinking and snacks. Today I started the day with a big breakfast, lots of protein and some complex carbs for my workout. Then I did the 300 ultimate abs workout (it took me 25 minutes instead of 15) and am planning on another mini workout before the day is over.

The best thing is a feel really good, it's only been a day and a half but I am proud of myself! This week's goal is exercise, I will do either Jillian's ab workout or the 300 ab workout everyday (minus 1 cheat day). I am also planning on buying some sort of cardio equipment so I can add 4 days of cardio as well. I am excited, I want this, and I am fully committed.

Healthy Goals

I have a a goal, to be healthier, and stronger. Yesterday was the first-ish day of the journal where I tried to eat healthy and did a Jillian Michaels workout, and by did I mean struggled to breathe while completing one third of the video. Today I ate vegetables with all of my meals :) and came in at the calorie count I was aiming for! I am very happy about this and will continue to post my success here. Tomorrow's goal is to exercise for at least 30 minutes and eat more vegetables!

One Year

I wrote, one year ago, in this blog. I wrote about being scared, being unsure about my life and my confidence in being happy. It's strange how many things can happen in a year, I know my limitations, and the wonderful thing is that I am okay with it. I have a new job, one that, though has a bit of office politics I still enjoy my day and even though I would rather not work going there every day isn't that bad.

I work in the food industry now, which is great because I love food a whole lot.

The funny thing is I realize why I don't blog anymore, in this moment I realize that I have what I have been searching for, I have the life that I have always wanted. I am happy.

Long Time Ago

I haven't written in a long time, and I just posted a wonderful poem by John McCrae, I posted this because I feel that it is important to love, respect and be thankful for the people who serve this county. A lot of my friends feel that the war is a bad thing, that the government is sending people to a war that doesn't matter, but I see it as a sacrifice. If their weren't soldiers to go to war then the government would be forced to enforce a draft, without our willing soldiers regular citizens would be forced into something they don't want to be a part of.

Soldiers sacrifice for our country, no matter what your feel about this war Canadian citizens are risking their lives for us, they should be remembered and respected.

Long Time Ago

In Flanders Fields

In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie,
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields. 

-John McCrae

Wonderful Wedding

I have been away for a long time, I have said this before, though this time I am much more confident in my decision. I read my previous post and I sounded so scared, it's not that I'm not scared (I know I have work to do) it's just I feel when things get bad I'm prepared now. I have the tools to cope, I have the tools to make my life the way I want it to be.

The funny part of this post is I've been watching glee all  day, and I've been on vacation for the last 2 weeks so it makes sense that I am happy with my life. It makes sense that without any stress I can be happy, I think anyone could be.

I got married 2 weeks ago, and somehow; even though it was an old school ceremony and we were technically married in December and I thought it wasn't going to change anything; I actually think it did. Somehow I feel loved, appreciated, sexy, comfortable and like things are perfect (even though I know they aren't.) I take immense joy in calling M my husband, I love the sound of it on my tongue, I love the way it makes me feel. I have always been an old fashioned girl, I love fantasy books filled with knights in shining armor, ladies in waiting and being swept off my feet. I have been swept so thoroughly off my feet that  haven't realized my dreams have come true.

I love this man who is my husband, I love him for caring about me and for making me the woman I am. I love him for fathering the children that I will have, but haven't yet, I love him for always wanting to make our lives better, for always being okay if I'm not perfect. I love him for making me know that this life is the one I'm supposed to be living, and I love him because I know he's going to love me for the rest of my life.

I am happy, and a little voice in my head is a little scared but at this moment I am happy.